Saturday, 4:47 pm

Who knew the Rock cafe cart was closed on Saturdays? Must we be forced to import our caffeine? Scandal!

Wednesday, 1:09 am

It's officially that final stretch toward break — you've suddenly realized you have two midterms, four papers and several pressing social obligations before the University bell tolls next Friday. And so as the night approaches its darkest hour, studiers pile into the Frisc and on this particular evening, the club is jumpin' jumpin'.

As such, this would be an opportune moment to discuss rules, etiquette and customs of the late-night study bender, or if you are one of the more unfortunate souls, the all-nighter:

— Comfort is key.

DO put on those moccasins and pull on a sweatshirt. In addition to the coziness it will provide, it will also prevent you from suffering the frostbite that plagues all Brown libraries.

DON'T wear high heels and a high-wasted skirt. Yes, girl-who-keeps-making-a-racket-everytime-she-walks, I am talking to you.

— Respect others.

DO remember that we're all in this together.

DON'T shush someone before 2 a.m. You can still go to the stacks.

— Caffeinate.

DO stake out the cafe cart just before closing time. If you ask really nicely, that extra coffee is all yours at the reasonable price of lukewarm, a little grind-y and FREE!

DON'T count on the vending machine. The Diet Cokes have been cleaned out for days.

— Remember that this is still a library

DO feel free to grab a little shut eye on one of the chaise lounges. We're still not sure what they're for otherwise.

DON'T snore. Too many decibels.

— Only the strong survive.

DO stake out a desk and hold onto it tight. Mark your territory.

DON'T assume anyone is here to help you. After 2 a.m., the stapler disappears from circulation, you cannot rent out headphones to block out the snoring, no one will fix the printer for you, and you better hope there's still toilet paper in the bathroom.

Good luck, and good night.

Saturday, 11:06 am

It is a new era in caffeine availability! For the past three years, the lobby cafe cart has persisted in opening at noon on weekends, birthing a real conundrum for many SciLi users: If you made it here on Saturday morning, chances are, you needed coffee. But behold! The cafe now opens at 10 a.m. on Saturdays and Sundays.

And for those of you who are no longer on meal plan, a symposium on something scientific is happening on the third floor and there are snacks and coffee. I may have no interest in brain science or whatever it is they're going on about, but I also have no shame in taking advantage of free caffeine.

Tuesday, 10:52 am

With the cafe carts closed until classes resume, will we be forced to resort to importing hot water heaters and coffee makers? When combined, the frigid cold temperature of all Brown libraries and a desperate need for caffeine may create the situation that drives us all to insanity.